Beautiful Boayan: Save it now!

This is Boayan. Isn't she beautiful? My family and I have been blessed to have vacationed here many years ago.  My boys were just there with friends and family over the Easter holidays. They really love it there and I am grateful that they are able to go to a place that isn't all about modern structures, airconditioning, or materialist luxury.  Here, luxury is abundant nature in all its glory.

Today Boayan was on the front page (hooray!) of The Philippine Daily Inquirer. I feel like the last to know that residents, Ditchay Roxas and her husband, Philippe Girardeau, are now fighting tooth and nail to keep the island away from developers who would turn it into a 5-star resort. 

When did we turn into a country that thinks (ooh, what an inappropriate word to use) 5-star is the best thing to do with our most beautiful beaches? Shouldn't we be pouring in funds to make sure that our environment stays healthy, vibrant and bountiful instead? Shouldn't we be rewarding Ditchay and people like her for doing precisely that wherever they are?

If you want to help save this beautiful piece of land and all the creatures that live in it, read all about Boayan and sign the online petition here.

Tell all your friends, blog about it, find it on Facebook and share it. 

SUNDAYS

It's a beautiful Sunday morning where I am. Everything feels green and sunny and for the first time in a very long time, I feel rested and able to sink comfortably into the quiet.

Some people feel lonely when it's quiet and the children are away, but I have learned to accept these moments of solitude with gratitude. I miss my children when they are away with their father, but I know that the time away from them is a time to gather energy, laughter, smiles, patience, a quick and ready sense of humor--all the things I seem to run out of in the course of mommying.  As a full-time mother, especially during the summer when the children are home all day long, you get quiet where you can and thank the universe for it.

Deep silence is the source of all the invisible forces that give us strength.  I know this because each time I feel stretched beyond my limits, I hunt it down and drink from it. Silence is so difficult to come by these days.  You don't even know it but everyday there is a steady hum from all the household appliances, the vibrations of vehicles on the road, all kinds of sounds permeating our environment.  We don't realize how inundated we are until all that sound suddenly dissipates to a level of quiet that I can only describe as Sunday-quiet. Every other day the air hums with life and activity, but on this last day before the week begins again, you feel a quality of stillness that isn't there on other days. This is why I love Sunday mornings. I hear more of the natural world on this day--the birds near and far, the air as it rushes through the trees, and sometimes even sunbeams, creeping through my curtains and resting on my floor. 

This morning I woke up to the realization that Sundays at home are best and I am thankful for knowing it and having it.

SUNSHINE ALL OVER THE PLACE

Yes. This much sunshine on my face and everywhere else. There is so much light on me I can barely see. Despite the doom and gloom around me and people throwing their depression, moodiness and bad-moodiness my way, I just feel that the time is NOW.  It's an energy that radiates in me--almost telling me to rush out and manifest dreams right this minute.  And this minute. And this.

I'm aware that this might possibly be one of the worst times yet, but I have experienced--many times over-- that the worst times can also be the best and they are certainly opportunities to see only the essence of things. I find that incredibly exciting. We've been living on fluff for far too long anyway. We've been allowing the outside to dictate who we are. We don't even know what we're capable of if left alone to decide things. We rarely hear ourselves think, or follow our thoughts, or hear them springing forth.  But now, at last, it could be the time for that.

We've spent decades complaining, wanting change, but I guess we just weren't ready enough, so the universe conspired for such a crisis so that we would literally be forced to change. And here it is. And despite all the dire predictions, I refuse to be put down. I'm not going to hoard whatever I have. I'm not going to think of only myself because who knows what will happen tomorrow. Instead, I have decided to do the opposite.

I will consciously create flow where I can. I will invest in individuals I believe in--people I know can change the world and are beginning to do important work in the realm of transformation. I will stay away from petty, bad mood individuals, who attempt to block my sunlight with their heavy sighs and burdensome self-indulgence. I believe those days are over. There are people I've been giving time to that I feel can no longer be helped by that, simply because it suddenly became clear they don't really want to help themselves. The time for that is over as well. I will pay attention and see where I'm truly needed and if I feel I'm wasting my time, I simply stop.

There is doom and gloom, of that we are all aware, but we can also choose to see that there can be great things that will spring forth from the muck, as always, if we hold out for it and work towards it, it will be there. 

It occurred to me that it is the end of A world, not THE world.  The much dreaded apocalypse has been upon us for some time and now it has come home.  There are places in which the new have sprung forth and are starting to take root and there are places--mostly within us--where the old just keeps festering.  In order to be relevant in this new world, so many questions need to be asked.

In this world where money is no longer what it used to mean, how do we invest? How do we spend? How do we give and receive? What do our jobs mean? Are we in the right place? Are we doing what we're supposed to? Existential questions of the past are now practical questions. I feel in my heart that is what the world requires today. There is no denying the importance of the essence of things and today, finally, we have entered that space where the questions we used to allow in only during rare moments are now at the forefront and are demanding attention.

Yes, these are difficult times, but there is sunshine all over the place as well, and it is in our power to choose the lens from which to view the world from now on. 

INVITE ALL THE DOCTORS IN YOUR LIFE!

If you'd like to know more about this conference, please email me at contact@panjeetapales.com and I will email you the brochure with rates and other info.  Let's spread the word of integration in medicine and health!

WITCH ON WHEELS

Really. Must I be a witch to get the kind of service we all deserve? I'm not even asking to be treated differently, but I find myself having to bring out my inner witch (which is fast becoming my outer) just to get people to step up to the appropriate level of professionalism. Must it be so?

I recently received a statement to pay for annual fees for a credit card I had terminated last year. I terminated it precisely because they couldn't get their act together.  I paid my bill as usual and they didn't post it.  Then they proceeded to charge me late fees and finance charges, despite the number of calls I made to correct their error. So I killed the account.  Then suddenly, after months of thinking I was rid of that, out surfaces another bill.  WHAT??? Whenever I call the hotline--make that tepid-line-- I am either put on forever-hold, or have to deal with a busy signal. Why is service so hard to come by?

I sometimes blame years of  living abroad for my frustration, but that's just the cushion I like to lie on from time to time. The truth is, I'm not wrong to expect things to simply go right!  I have been going through nightmare situations with a plumber, contractors, not to mention the daily irritants with salespeople in stores everywhere. Over the holidays, I walked into the housewares section of an upscale department store, to find a group of salespeople practicing a choreographed dance number, their sound system overriding the store's own Christmas carols. They were doing this amidst the breakables, mind you, and the presence of customers did nothing to awaken them to the inappropriateness of their behavior. I flashed them a look of displeasure and decided to leave as it was clearly not a day I was going to get good service.

Recently, I noticed a smell coming off some of my plates and asked the dishwasher service people what that might be.  The day they came, my stoneware had the smell but the regular dishes didn't.  Their diagnosis: don't use the stoneware in the dishwasher.  That was as far we they were willing to go.  There was no inclination to check further, probe somewhere, think more. That was it. I had to explain, with super-human patience, that I used all the dishes in a tinier dishwasher last year and never had that problem. To date, the company has not given me a satisfying answer. Instead, I asked a plumber (oh, but let's not go there)to diagnose the problem, which he did, and now we are testing the efficacy of his solution.

Only yesterday I asked another credit card company for a reversal of late fees because their inability to fulfill my request to re-send me paper bills a few months ago, again threw me for a loop.  Yes, sure, they would do that, but first I had to pay the fees. Fine, I said, already gathering my deepest breaths, but I don't have to call you again to remind you, right?  Maam, I'm sorry but you will have to call us again after you've paid because we cannot process the request for reversal until you have paid. Yes, but why do I have to call you again? Maam, I'm sorry but.....

But what, really, I wonder? But I am unable to think beyond the parameters written on whatever handbook I have in front of me? But I don't want to think that there might be an underlying problem that has nothing to do with whether the plates are made of glass, ceramic or clay? But what?

In the meantime, I wonder why one has to bare fangs in order for people to do what they ought to.  Do we have to get to the point of letter-writing to see things done properly? It's only when an establishment's reputation is threatened that people begin to move as they should.

Really, must I be a witch on wheels?

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No Shortcuts

What will it finally take to make change happen in our country? Will it take something tragic or inspiring? Will it take the emergence of that ideal leader--the "alternative" we have all been dreaming of? Will it take jobs, food, shelter and education for all? Clean elections? What will it really take for change to take root and flourish? There is only one clear and sure answer and it points right at you. None of the above would truly address what ails us. Change is you. This realization makes too many scurry to the hills, away from anything that might force them to do something about it. That is the tragic reality. We keep talking about it, praying and chanting it, yet are we truly ready to birth, and perpetuate change?

Isn't it easier to point at the politician, the rotten system, corruption, our parents, substandard education, past trauma--anything that is outside and beyond our control, than to acknowledge that it is in our hands and so we must act on it? And exactly what does this entail that frightens us all?

Change in us: that scares the hell out of everyone. And with that, the painful process of realizing what it is we need to change, then going through many more death processes and saying goodbye to the many parts of ourselves we need to let go, so that we can bring in the new. Then the constant work of renewing ourselves, the adjusting and re-adjusting of our views and lifestyles, as we become able bearers of authentic change. Change was never meant to be easy and there is no less demanding path; there are no shortcuts.

Inner work towards any kind of transformation is a lifelong commitment. It is a turbulent path rather than a decided and fixed destination. It is difficult and unpleasant. The only compass is your determination and will to keep the course. It means loss--of worlds and friends. It entails truth in every form. Who wants to look into the dark crevices of one's own life, to shine a light on those muddy corners we've created that we can't even bear to peek at? It is easier to say that corruption is outside and must therefore be fixed there, and please, let me not look at what goes wrong in my own backyard, at my own relationships and ways of being in the world. Let me spend the rest of my days pointing a finger but never lifting it.

Yet in my experience each time we turn away from doing what we know in our hearts we ought to, the call simply becomes louder and the universe creates situations that make it ever more impossible to ignore the call of that part of us that we know is True. Circumstances seem to connive until everything becomes up close, personal, and difficult to ignore. It is change pressing itself upon us. Every hardship in life is a call for change; it is an invitation to take a different route. If we took change by its horns and rode it valiantly, perhaps we wouldn't have to deal with such complicated situations in our lives. No, life wouldn't be easier, but I'm willing to bet it wouldn't be so complicated. If we stopped running away from the work we need to do on ourselves today, we would be able to handle life's surprises with grace and equanimity. Change would simply be our guide.

I feel that the very essence of every human being is to use his biography--yes, with all its inherent pain and seeming ugliness--towards transforming humanity and the world--everywhere he lands, no matter where that is, he is called upon to create change, just like the Christ did. And if His journey is the gauge, where did we get the idea that life shouldn't be as painful and difficult as it is? We turn away from change because it is inconvenient. It is demanding. It's such a long and tedious process. It's painful. It is hurtful. And yet running away from it only makes the journey more difficult in the long run.

This is why Andres Bonifacio is remembered and revered as "Liwanag" and Emilio Aguinaldo "Ningning". Bonifacio believed in completing the process of inner purification towards greater transformation. He believed in the importance of one's inner condition because that is what inevitably manifests in the world. Any change, without a thorough inner cleansing, will only be superficial. Aguinaldo was all bells and whistles, but his inner condition left much to be desired. He glittered and was shiny and promising, but the integrity--the rich and conscious inner life-- was not there. In human history, many have died fighting to complete, redeem and claim this inner journey towards change and it is them we remember and admire because we know their lives were about this universal truth: that change in the world cannot happen if we haven't done the work of changing ourselves first.

So, yes, point the finger at those who must be reminded of what it means to lead humanely and justly, but also look with grace, courage and resolve into the mirror and decide at last to be that change. No amount of fist-raising and indignant shouting at rallies will bring the change. The anger won't do it. Showing people, time and again, in ever more creative ways, about the wrong we continue to do, won't do it either. The relentless call for "Ibagsak" whatever is just clawing at the outer skin of our ailments. To get to what we need to raise and bring forth instead, is a call for inner reflection and work, because it will inevitably point to the need for every individual to pledge his life to truth and integrity. Everyone is accountable. No change will hold if we are not able to receive and bear it, and make it live and thrive in our society.

Inner work is invisible. Its legacy manifests only over time. You cannot market it, yet it is the cornerstone of any kind of awakening and transformation. There is simply no cutting corners. Creating new initiatives that address only the outer realities will not bring about the change we all dream of. It happens inside and it is in our hands.

I sound like a broken record, I know, but lately I've been getting comments here and there that bring this topic home again. It's not in the hands of politicians. The solutions are not somewhere out there, but in us already. People tend to disappear when I say that, as if they are overwhelmed by adding yet another task to the many each of us already carries, but I like to see it as the net that holds everything. It isn't one more thing you need to do that is separate from the rest; it is the thread that binds everything you do together to contain the whole.