Sunday, September 12, 2010

The Inner Condition

I've been thinking about this a lot, especially since August 23. We look to the outside too much and pay hardly enough attention to what goes on inside us.

I had a run in with someone who calls himself a healer a few months back. First, the man was difficult to reach and never responded. Our mutual friend said it was because he was always losing his phone. Already then I felt a twinge of alarm. It sounded like he was all over the place and didn't have his act together.  I'm not sure that bodes well for someone who works in the realm of health. But, like I always do, I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and try again.

This time the response was swift. He asked me to fill up quite involved questionnaires. They were so involved that I put them aside, especially since there was a lot going on in my household at the time. Finally,  when things settled, I got everything done and called him back. His replies were so negative. He said that he couldn't believe how long it took me to reply and the image of a mother who can't even put aside an hour while her children are very sick is disturbing. He went on to make other assumptions that came from left field--that perhaps my husband was against homeopathics and if that were the case, why there are so many articles that support the work--blah, blah, blah. He was offensive and judgmental at the very least. That, to me, is NOT a healer. A healer includes and makes whole. He doesn't divide and puncture. We hadn't even started and he was already all over the place with his negativity and unfounded conjectures. It was very clear to me that I could not allow him into my family life.

In the interest of being objective and impartial, we have made it our practice to ignore the inner condition of people. But as I get older, I find that I am more and more interested in that because in the end, that is what informs everything.  What we experience outside comes from there and I cannot put a person's inner condition separate from everything else. That healer was toxic. I cannot put my family's health in his hands. I can no longer say, well, he has personal issues but maybe his work will stand. No more. I've learned over and over again that it is an indivisible whole. Especially in the realm of health, it simply cannot be.

When we begin to understand, recognize and practice seeing the whole rather than the parts, I believe our lives will be made simpler, richer and our paths so much clearer. What is inside always manifests outside.